Life Of A Stranger
by luvin-benadam
Summary: Nearly sixteen years ago, Ryan and Marissa were faced with the most difficult decision of their lives. Seperation of them and thier twins. But now the girls have found each other and all hell is about to break loose.
1. Chapter 1

They sat there admiring their girls, the past six months they had spent with the loves of their lives. Marissa smiled as she watched the twins sitting on the blanket before her and Ryan, already regretting what she was about to do.

"I could take them back to LA with me; send them to you every other week," Marissa offered.

"They're six months old Marissa. We're not shipping out six months old twins back and forth across the country," Ryan countered. "I could keep them here in New York with me for a year or two, then send them to you."

"Ryan you're not seriously asking me to miss the first year or two of our daughters' lives are you?" Marissa asked, appalled that he would even ask that question.

Ryan was silent for a second before saying, "No you're right. I would never ask you to do that."

They sat there in silence for a minute longer, both knowing how it was going to end but attempting to avoid it at all costs.

"You know what this has come down to don't you?" Marissa asked, tears building in her eyes.

"You'll take Ellie?" Ryan asked, almost as though he was asking permission. Between Ellie and Emma, Ellie was so much more like Marissa, even though the girls were six months old and the majority of their personality hadn't developed. Marissa nodded and sniffed back her tears, finding it incomprehensible that she was about to leave her daughter, her little six month old baby, along with the love of her life, behind in New York while she took the other twin to LA.

"An you'll keep Emma," Marissa finished, shuddering her breath and holding back her tears by clenching her jaw. Ryan looked over at Marissa and wanted to reach out and comfort her the way he use to; to hold her in his arms and know everything would be fine. But he knew that that was over.

"They can't ever meet each other, ever know that they have a twin that the other parent is raising. All they can know is that the other parents walked out, as painful as that is," Marissa said, tilting her head back to gather her composure and then leaning forwards to look at her girls. She couldn't believe that this was the last time she would ever see them together, the last time she would ever see Ryan.

With a casual glance at her watch, Marissa cleared her throat and stood. Her flight left in four hours and she still had to make it to the airport. She closed the small space separating her from her daughters and picked Emma up, cradling her tiny baby to her chest and burying her head in her neck, noticing Ryan going to the blanket as well and picking up Ellie, both Ryan and Marissa savoring the last moments with the daughters they would never see again.

With a last, sobbing gasp from Marissa, she extracted her head from Emma's neck and handed her to Ryan, simultaneously taking Ellie from Ryan's hesitant arms.

"Goodbye Ryan," Marissa said after slipping Ellie's coat onto her tiny body.

He walked two of his girls to the door and carried her bags to the elevator in front of their penthouse door, pressing the down button and waiting for the ding. He turned his eyes to Marissa, Ellie clutched tight in her trembling arms, silently begging her not to go. As the elevator reach the top, Marissa stepped in with the luggage and gave Ryan a sad look.

But as the doors started to slide closed, Ryan stuck out his foot and stopped the doors. "Marissa please," Ryan begged, his eyes pleading. "We can do this Marissa, this is just another bump in the road, just another fight. We can fix this!"

Marissa let out another breath, one she hadn't realized she was holding, and gave up fighting her tears. "Ryan," her voice was quiet but confidant. "Ryan we've tried everything," she sobbed. "We just need to get away from each other." It pained her to say that more than anything, but it was the truth.

In a swift motion, Ryan stepping into the elevator and pressed his lips against Marissa's, careful not to squish Ellie and Emma who were both still in their parents arms, oblivious to the fact that this would be the last time they ever say each other. "I'll always love you Marissa," he said as he stepped back out.

"I love you too Ryan," Marissa said as the doors slid shut and the sight of Ryan and Emma disappeared for the last time.

For the next three hours, Ryan sat outside the doors of the elevator, Emma sitting contently in his lap, waiting for the elevator to ding and Marissa to step out with Ellie in her arms. But she never did, and Ryan accepted it.

"Well," he said to the little girl tight in his embrace. "I guess it's just you and me from now on."

_**15 years, 5 months later**_

"Emma we're going to be late!" Ryan called up the stairs of the upper-east side Manhattan penthouse.

From the top of the spiraling staircase came his sixteen-year old daughter decked in a simple summer Gucci dress, black, that accentuated her small frame, her long golden-blonde hair hanging loose and wavy, cork-wedge sandals leading the way down.

"You look cute," Ryan complimented, handing his daughter her black Fendi bag.

"Oh great! Now I have to go change," she joked in return.

Ryan laughed, glad that Emma was making light of the situation and knowing he shouldn't have let Seth anywhere near his daughter while they visited Newport in the summers. She finished the trip down the stairs and kissed her fathers cheek. Ryan handed her, her thick black headband she had given him to hold onto earlier. She took it with a cheeky smile and pushed it behind her ears, dragging her sideways cut bangs back and adjusting her hair in the circular mirror at the base of the stairs.

"Stop fussing Em," Ryan told his daughter, taking her elbow in his palm and guiding her towards the front door. "You look fantastic."

Ryan left Emma standing by the door while he grabbed his wallet, then returned to the front door. He noted Emma's stature immediately. Where his usually confidant, smart, out-going daughter normally held herself, his little girl was replaced with a shy, head-hung girl who resembled a five-year old who had done something wrong.

"Hey," he said, reaching out his hand and tilting her chin up, looking into the eyes that were identical to his own. "Sweetie what's wrong?"

She looked up, responding to one of the many endearments he constantly used. Ryan dropped his eyes to the hem of Emma's black silk dress which she was fidgeting nervously with.

"I know this is tough babe," he said, using another one of the endearments. "But before you know it this funeral will be over and we can go back to our regular old boring lives," Ryan said with one of his famous half grins.

Emma nodded and allowed her father to guide her out the front door with a loving hand on the small of her back. Despite what people said, Emma knew that he and her dad were going to make it. They had gone sixteen years with only each other, they would pull each other through this too, just like they always did.

Los Angeles 

"Ellie, Ellie, over here!" The voices were coming from all four points around her, light from the paparazzi, or shutter-bugs as she liked to call them, blinding. But she remained poised, lips pulled into a tight smile, half her face hidden behind her large, dark, Donna Karen sunglasses. She was trained in the art of perfection, the spitting image of beauty, grace, and elegance. It was the mask that she lived behind, always there, just like her father, hiding her, shielding her from the terrors of the world she was forced to face every day. This was her job; her one and only job. She was, after all, the daughter of the ultra-fabulous model slash actress Marissa Copper. The life Ellie led was to be expected.

She continued to push her way through the crowd, a determined yet polite expression on her face as she maneuvered through the sea of people. She needed to see assertive yet courteous. In her mothers business, image was everything.

Ellie felt the firm, warm hand of her bodyguard gently come to a rest on her back and she smiled. Things just felt a million times safer when Carlos was there to protect her. Through the mass of paparazzi and curious on-lookers, Ellie caught sight of the reason she was there. A tall, lanky girl with long red ringlets was standing waiting for her, Michael, her bodyguard, standing directly behind her.

"Ellie!" the girl cried out in sheer enthusiasm.

"Scarlett!" Ellie cried back, rushing over to her best friend and embracing her in a tight hug.

The onslaught of camera flashbulbs went off all the more. Scarlett, who's father was the lead singer of one of the world's hottest bands and who's mother was a hot notorious model, knew all about the media and how to work it. And between her and Ellie, the two could turn heads and he on the front cover of half the tabloids on the west coast after just one night out.

After an exchange of adorable smiled, just enough to keep the shutterbugs satisfied but wanting more, Ellie and Scarlett moved their perfectly manufactured smiles into the club where their phony smiles dropped and they drowned their teenage sorrows in tequila shots.


	2. Chapter 2

Just so you guys know, I'm not the person who posted The Parent Trap on the OC boards but this story is inspired by it. So partial credit goes to her for a slim part of the idea. But this story is going to go in a completely different direction and I promise to keep things interesting. And the names that I chose, Ellie and Emma, are named after people I know. Oh and what happened to Ryan and Marissa's marriage will be explained in upcoming chapters.

**Just to clear things up: Ryan and Emma live in New York, Marissa and Ellie live in LA. All are still alive and who's funeral Ryan and Emma are going to will be revealed in this chapter!**

**Disclaimer: Not mine, don't own 'em. Just like to mess with them. But don't worry, I'll put them back just as I found them.**

Holly slapped a copy of the latest issue of the LA Sun onto Marissa's table, a disapproving look crossing her face. Marissa sighed as her eyes fell upon the cover. The picture was of Ellie and Scarlett, tequila shots in their hands, fingers of random, older guys creeping over the young girl's bodies. The caption above it read, "Model's Daughters Gone Wild." Marissa threw the magazine face down back onto the table with another sigh. Just another day in the life of Marissa Cooper with the impossible teenage daughter.

"You need to do something about this Marissa," her assistant Holly commented.

Marissa shook her head. Yet another failure as a mother to add to her impressive record with Ellie. "Can you track her down and get her over here immediately?" Marissa asked. Holly nodded and scurried off and Marissa fought the tears. Ellie was just so damn stubborn; so much like Ryan sometimes it was scary. Except for the drinking and partying, that she got from her mother.

Twenty minutes later the door to her dressing room opened and Ellie entered, all charming smiles and flirtatious eye batting. "Hey Mom," she cooed.

Marissa glared at her. "Cut the crap Ellie," she spat. Ellie dropped her phoney smile and glared back at her mother. "What the hell were you thinking," Marissa raged. "You could have been killed!"

"My god Mom! Do you think I'm stupid!" Ellie yelled back.

"Well when my sixteen-year old daughter gets drunk at a club with her best friend and ends up on the font cover of a tabloid magazine, what the hell am I supposed to think? Do you know what all your partying is doing to my career!"

Ellie gawked. "And there it is," Ellie said quietly. But the venom in her voice made up for the lack of volume. "It's always about you."

Marissa closed her eyes and when she opened them again, she noticed the nervous fidgeting Ellie was doing, the spaghetti strap camisole she was wearing was not enough to cover the bruises that Ellie herself had just noticed. She was crossing her arms across her chest, burying her purple wrists under her thin, tanned arms.

Marissa stood from her chair and approached her daughter. "What happened El?" she asked kindly, taking Ellie's hidden wrist into her hand.

But Ellie wrenched her hand out of her mother's grasp and stepped back, readjusting her sunglasses on the top of her head and fiddling with the strap on her Gucci bag.

"Don't," Ellie growled.

"Ellie … sweetie," Marissa countered, stepping towards her daughter who was shaking. Marissa couldn't tell if it was from anger or fear.

"Don't!" Ellie yelled louder, then dropped her voice to a hoarse, tear-filled whisper. "Don't pretend you care."

Marissa shuddered, the harshness of Ellie's words echoing in her brain. "This can't on Ellie," Marissa said quietly. "I can't deal with this right now."

Ellie took another step back, eyes welling with tears. She wiped her sweaty palms on her dark-wash True Religion jeans. "What are you saying?" Ellie sobbed.

"We need some time away from each other," Marissa whispered, flashbacks of what she had said to Ryan sixteen years ago running through her mind.

"Mom," Ellie whispered.

"There's a place that you can go to in New York. I looked into it last year when you were into all that stuff you shouldn't have been. You can stay with your Grandpa Jimmy until you're ready to come home."

Ellie shoved her sunglasses back onto her face. She would be damned if she let her mother see her cry. "So you're going to ship me off because you're too busy to deal with me yourself. Typical," she spat.

Marissa ground her teeth subconsciously, caught herself, then stopped. She wouldn't let Ellie get to her. She was the mother, the adult. It was her responsibility to take care of her daughter. Marissa watched a solitary tear slide it's way down Ellie's cheek from under her sunglasses and she took a step towards her. This time, Ellie didn't step away. "Oh Ellie," Marissa said, removing her daughter's sunglasses from her face. Ellie immediately put her hands to her face, sobbing into her palms.

"Baby," Marissa breathed out, her own tears spilling over the brim of her eyes. She gathered her daughter into her arms, cradling Ellie like she had Emma the last time she saw her. Ellie gasped, breathing in the familiar scent of her mother's expensive perfume and savouring the precious moment.

"Mom I'll be good! I promise," Ellie whispered into her mother's neck.

"Ellie I want to believe you. I really do honey. But we need this. You spend far too much time in the limelight. I think a nice quiet few months in New York is exactly what you need Ellie."

"LA is my home. The only other place I've ever lived is in Paris when I was at school there. But I love LA Mom! Beverly Hills is the only home I've ever known!"

Marissa pulled Ellie tighter to her. "I love you so much Ellie. But I need you to do this. I need you to get better."

Ellie sighed and pulled away, nodding. Marissa nodded too and brushed Ellie's years away with her thumb.

"I'll come with you to the airport," Marissa said. Ellie nodded and allowed her mothers arm to snake across her shoulders. "It'll be alright baby. It's all going to be alright."

New York 

Emma remained seated in the black chair, face hidden behind the mask that she had created, then perfected. Her eyes were clouded over as she watched the guests of the funeral mill around, some watching as the casket was lowered into the ground, other's sobbing into the other's arms. Emma sighed. She didn't below here. She hardly even knew the man that had died. He was only a colleague of her fathers. But he had asked her to come with him, and she had obliged. They were always there for each other.

"Ready to go kiddo?" Ryan asked, standing above Emma with an understanding look on his face.

Emma nodded. Funeral's were depressing. They took a cab back to their apartment, and went up, Ryan's hand always on the small of Emma's back in a fatherly way.

"I'm sorry I made you come to that," he apologized.

"It's alright," Emma said.

"No it's not. I never should have made you come," Ryan countered.

"Dad … It's fine."

Emma knew that her dad always made far to big of a fuss about her. But honestly, she expected nothing less. It was just the two of them; if they didn't look out for each other, who would.

"I heard from Seth yesterday," Ryan said, walking into the kitchen, followed by Emma.

"What did he say?" she asked, tucking her dress under her and sitting on the barstool.

"He said that him and Summer are doing good. Reese and Hannah are good too."

"What about Grandma and Grandpa?" Emma asked.

Since moving out, the Cohen family had certainly grown. Seth and Summer had gotten married and had two kids. Reese, the older of the two, had just celebrated his seventeenth birthday three weeks earlier. Their daughter, Hannah, had just turned thirteen.

"Uncle Seth says they're bored in retirement," Ryan laughed, picturing Sandy and Kirsten lounging around the house and not knowing what to do with themselves.

"Ya that's what Grandma says too," Emma said, taking a bite out of a carrot Ryan had handed her.

"Oh ya? When did you talk to Grandma?" Ryan asked. Since Marissa and Ellie had left, Ryan had taken Emma to Newport every summer to spend time with their family. To her, Kirsten and Sandy were her grandparents, Seth and Summer her uncle and aunt, and Reese and Hannah her cousins. And that's the way they both liked it. And although Emma knew that they weren't her blood family, she loved them and to her and Ryan both, they would always be their family.

"Yesterday. I called her after I got home from school," Emma said.

Ryan smiled. He loved the way Emma adored her family.

"How is school going?" he asked, pulling up the stool beside her.

"It's good," Emma replied. "Well you know, as good as school can be," she laughed. Ryan smiled.

Every time he saw Emma smile, he couldn't help but see Marissa and think about Ellie. He had seen her face littered over the covers of magazines when he was out shopping; occasionally seeing Ellie as well and finding it overwhelming that she looked so much like Emma. Then he mentally hit himself. What could he expect? They were twins.

New York Airport 

Ellie picked up her Louis Vitton bag from the luggage carrier and walked around the pickup section, looking for her Grandpa. Finally, she spotted him, a copy of the day's newspaper in his arms as he looked for his granddaughter. They spotted each other and closed the distance separating them, wrapping Ellie in a tight hug.

"How's my grandbaby?" he asked affectionately, hugging Ellie again.

"I'm good," Ellie replied automatically.

Jimmy gave her a knowing smile, understanding that she was lying.

"Grandpa do you think it would be ok if I went for a walk?" Ellie asked.

"Don't you want to drop off your stuff first pumpkin?" Jimmy asked.

"I meant after," Ellie said with a smile.

Jimmy grinned, guiding Ellie through the airport with a hand on her back. He had only seen her for five minutes and she was already trying to get rid of him. "Won't you get lost? Manhattan's a bug city you know."

"I've been her before Gramps. With Mom while she worked," Ellie smiled.

Jimmy laughed and nodded his head. "Alright kiddo. As long as you promise not to get into any trouble."

XXXXX 

"Dad I think I'm going to go for a walk," Emma said to her father as she finished up the last of the snack Ryan had placed before them.

"Do you want some company?" he asked, wiping his face with a napkin.

"Actually I think I need some time alone," she said with a sad smile.

"Alright," Ryan replied. "Just don't go to far, take your phone, and be back by dinner."

Emma smiled and kissed her dads' cheek. "Love you," she said as she slid on her shoes and walked towards the door.

"Love you too," Ryan said.

XXXXX 

Ellie walked down the sidewalks of Upper East Side Manhattan, taking in the large Central Park brownstones and tall, luxurious apartment buildings. She liked it in New York; like the trees and the noises and the taxis. She couldn't explain it, she just did. From farther down the street, she could see a girl who looked to be about the same age as her, black strapless dress blowing behind her in the chilly wind, long golden-blonde hair flying behind her.

Ellie's heart did a backflip. There was something familiar about her and she didn't know what. As they got closer together, Ellie's heart picked up pace. She didn't know it, but as did Emma's.

When they were about two feet apart, the both stopped, dumbfounded. It was as though they were staring into a mirror. They stared at each other another second before gulping, and wondering what to do.


	3. Chapter 3

Ellie stared into the girl's eyes, which were identical to her own. Flashbacks from the movie 'The Parent Trap' were reeling through her mind. She stood there another second, deciding on playing the role of Hallie. She would be the girl in denial, the girl who pretended there was nothing between her and the complete stranger who looked so much like herself.

She graced a smile onto her face and approached the girl, ignoring the golden-brown leaves that she loved so much that were falling all around her.

"Hi," she said, batting her large, crystal-blue eyes and dark feathery lashes.

Emma smiled unsurely. This girl was a mirror image of herself. "Hi," she said back, stopping as the other girl approached her. The girls' hand was extended towards her and she shook it hesitantly and instantly felt the shivers run down her spine. Ellie felt it too, though she would be damned if she ever admitted it.

"I'm Ellie," Ellie said, placing her most charming, paparazzi-worthy smile on and wished the girl would stop looking so shell-shocked.

"Emma," Emma replied. "You're not from around here are you?" Emma didn't know what made her say it, but she had. There was just something so refreshingly un-Manhattan about her that screamed tourist. She had tanned skin that only years on a beach could perfect and just the way her hair sat in unrulely yet tamed waves made Emma believe she wasn't native. And the fact that she was wearing a short jean skirt that made her vulnerable to the bitter autumn New York wind only confirmed her suspicions.

Ellie smiled. "How can you tell?"

Emma grinned back, glad to know that her instincts had panned out. "I'm a Manhattan girl, we can always tell."

Ellie smiled shyly, suddenly uncomfortable under Emma's prying eyes. There was something about Emma that made Ellie feel that she couldn't lie to her. And that scared her. Her whole life had been built around lies, the armour and walls she had put up to protect herself. And to think that the walls she had spent the past sixteen years perfecting could be crumbled by one look from an identical stranger made her want to vomit.

"Do you have anywhere to be? … Because I'd really like to talk." Ellie mentally hit herself. There it was, the word-vomit, straight out of her mouth and into Emma's ears before she had time to take it back.

Emma's sceptical look softened and she nodded. "I'd like that. I know this great little coffee shop down just down the block. We could get lattes and sit in the park," Emma offered, a look on her face that suggested her idea was about to be rejected.

Ellie hesitated, then smiled genuinely. Not one of the fake, phoney smiles she put on for publicity, but an actual honest-to-God smile. "That sounds awesome."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

Ryan sighed, sitting down on the couch and hating the silence. He wished Emma were back; she always kept life interesting and him on his toes. The thought of phoning her and asking to come home crossed his mind, but he instantly rejected it. Emma was like him in the way that she never liked to talk about how she felt. She just needed time by herself to brood, and Ryan would give that to her.

Dialling the numbers on the phone, he listened to the ring and for the sound of the voice on the other end.

"Hello?" the female voice answered.

Ryan smiled. It was so good to hear her voice. "Hey Kirsten."

"Ryan!" Her quiet voice immediately perked up. "How's it going? How's Emma?"

"Em's fine, so is everything else. I just wanted to check in." He couldn't see her, but he knew she was smiling.

"I heard from Jimmy yesterday," Kirsten said in what she hoped was a nonchalant tone but swallowing hard.

"Oh ya? How is he?" He kept his tone light and unsuspecting. He knew where this conversation was going.

"He's good … He talked to Marissa about three days ago," Kirsten said, clearing her throat. Ryan remained silent and tried to ignore the tugging at his heart at the sound of her name. "Marissa sent Ellie to live with him."

Ryan coughed to cover the curse word that escaped his lips. "Where?" he quietly spit out. "Why?"

Kirsten sighed. "Apparently Ellie was just too much to handle for Marissa. Ellie was into too many bad things and …"

Ryan finished her sentence, "She shipped our daughter off for someone else to handle. Typical."

Kirsten tried not to see too much into the fact that he called Ellie 'our daughter' and not 'her daughter' or 'my daughter'. She couldn't quite figure out what he meant. "Ryan, Jimmy wouldn't tell me where he and Ellie were living. He just said that Marissa wanted a quiet life for Ellie, to downplay everything the poor kid's been through," Kirsten said.

"Why didn't she send her to me? I'm her father!" Ryan shook his head, unable to comprehend the fact that his daughter was too much for Marissa to handle and that she pawned her off to live with her grandfather instead of her father.

"Ryan as far as Ellie's concerned she has no idea that she has a father who loves her and an identical twin sister in Manhattan. To tell her now that she kept an amazing family from her for sixteen years would only damage Marissa's relationship with Ellie more," Kirsten bartered.

Ryan sighed, knowing she was right. " I know. It's just … God I love Ellie. She's my daughter. And just thinking about her into all the things that Marissa was into makes me sick. I just want to help her, rescue her."

Kirsten smiled; Ryan never could resist a damsel in distress. And the fact that he was admitting it just went to show how much he had changed. "I know Ryan. I know. But Jimmy assures me that he and Ellie are going to pull through, that they're going to make it."

"Did he say when Ellie was going to live with him?" Ryan asked, running his fingers through his hair.

"When I talked to him yesterday he said her flight left LAX at 4pm. She should be with him now; wherever he is."

Ryan paused, then said, "Did he say how Marissa was?" then flinched. He wanted desperately to know, to know that she was doing great and that she was happy. If only he could talk to her himself.

"He said she was ok; struggling with the fact that she was about to ship Ellie off, but doing ok considering," Kirsten said, relaying the information Jimmy had given her about Marissa. "He also said she misses Emma …" Kirsten hesitated and wondered to tell her son the rest of what Marissa said to Jimmy. "And you."

Ryan gulped. Not a day went by that he didn't think about Marissa and Ellie and the life they could have had as a family with Emma. He missed her more than life itself and wanted her back. But he had let that part of his life go and moved on, or so he told himself to get through the day. "I miss her too," he said quietly.

Kirsten smiled sadly. She knew that Ryan and Marissa loved each other so much and the fact that they weren't together was a shame. They always had been one of those couples that would always be a couple not matter what.

"Well I have to run Ry. I'm making Sandy a roast and he's going to get mad if my full attention isn't on it and it ruin it. But you should come here this weekend. It's been at least a month since we last saw you. You should come home," Kirsten laughed.

Ryan laughed with her. "I'll ask Em and let you know. Tell everyone I say hi."

"Will do. And say hi to Emma. We love you Ryan."

"We love you too."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

Ellie and Emma sat in an awkward silence on a bench in the middle of Central Park, sipping their warm lattes in an attempt to warm themselves from the chilly wind.

"So when's your birthday?" Ellie asked to break the silence.

Emma swallowed what was left in her mouth turned her eyes to Ellie. "August 7th," Emma said.

Ellie stuttered on the gulp of latte that was in her mouth, regaining the air back to her lungs by coughing. "Mine too," she sputtered.

Emma gawked at her. "Seriously? … Let's play five questions. I'll go first."

Ellie nodded, adjusting her skirt and wishing she had worn something warmer.

"Where do you live?"

"Los Angeles," Ellie answered automatically and with pride. She adored telling people that.

Emma looked impressed. "What are your parents names?"

Ellie hesitated. Part of the deal she had made with her mother was that she wouldn't tell anyone she was the daughter of Marissa Cooper. It was telling people that that had gotten her into some trouble in the first place. But again, she felt like she couldn't lie to Emma and decided to tell her the truth. "It's only me and my mom, Marissa Cooper." Ellie paused and waited for the inevitable gasp. And sure enough, it came.

"Your mom's Marissa Cooper? The famous model slash actress Marissa Cooper?" Emma gawked.

Ellie smiled. "The one and only."

Emma smiled in appreciation and moved on to the next question. "What about your dad?"

"Walked out on my mom when he found out she was pregnant," Ellie answered nonchalantly. She hated talking about her father, or lack-there-of.

Emma gave her a sad smile. "I'm sorry. Why are you in Manhattan?"

Ellie hesitated again. She also wasn't supposed to go around telling everybody why she was in New York. "I got into a bit of trouble back home and my mom wanted me to get out of the city," she said. And there was the word-vomit again.

"Last question, then it's my turn," Ellie grinned coyly. She was just as interested in Emma as Emma was in her.

"Who are you staying with?" Emma asked.

"My grandfather … My turn," Ellie said excitedly. "Have you lived in Manhattan your whole life?"

Emma smiled. She, just like Ellie, loved to brag about where she lived. "Yes."

"Awesome," Ellie said. "Do you live with your parents?"

"My dad. My mom left right after she had me," Emma said sadly.

Ellie gave her a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. My dad adores me and I love it being just the two of us," Emma replied.

Ellie nodded solemnly. "Do you ever wish you had a mother?"

"Sometimes," Emma replied. "Mostly when it's girly stuff like guys that I don't like to talk to my dad about," she smiled.

Ellie grinned. "Next question … what's your favourite dessert?"

Emma hesitated, brow furrowed in concentration. "I'd have to say ice cream cake. But it has to have chocolate flakes on top," Emma laughed.

"Seriously?" Ellie asked, awe-struck. "That's my favourite dessert too!"

Emma let her mouth fall open. "Strange."

"No kidding. Ok last question," Ellie said, dipping her head and thinking. "What's your favourite colour?"

"Ooh good one," Emma said. "It's defiantly a tie between tealy-turquoise and pink."

Ellie laughed, then said quietly, "Mine too."

Emma and Ellie sat in silence, both comprehending that fact that they were so much alike. It was scary. With the golden-brown leaves falling all around them, they fell into a comfortable silence and allowed the sound of the crunching leaves to fill the holes in their lives.


	4. Chapter 4

Ellie looked to her watch, realizing with a start that it was ten to seven at night. "Wow," she exclaimed. "We've been talking for hours."

Emma glanced to her own watch and was taken aback at how quick the time had gone by. "Holy. My dad's probably having a heart attach," Emma laughed.

Ellie felt a stab of jealousy towards Emma. She had a father who was probably out of his mind with worry about where she was and why she wasn't home. Then realized with guilt that her grandfather was probably sick with worry as well.

"You're going to be in New York for awhile right?" Emma asked, her voice filled with hope.

Ellie smiled sadly. She was beginning to like New York, but she would always miss LA. "If my mother has anything to say about it, I think I may be here the rest of my life," Ellie said in all seriousness.

"Ok," Emma said, relieved. "I'd like to hang out again."

Ellie smiled genuinely. "I'd like that too."

They stood from the bench and Ellie pulled a pen and piece of paper out of her Gucci bag. In the neat cursive writing that Emma noticed was written with her left hand, just like herself, Ellie scrawled down her name and cell phone number, handed the paper to Emma, then handed her a second blank sheet and gestured for Emma to write down her number. She did so, then handed the sheet with her number back to Ellie.

"Promise me we'll keep in touch?" Ellie asked, her voice bordering on begging.

"I promise," Emma replied in a tone that made Ellie believe she was telling the truth. And in a motion that she would normally never do, Emma leaned in and pulled Ellie into a hug. "I promise," Emma whispered again in Ellie's ear and Ellie believed her.

They pulled apart and with a last fleeting glance and a sad wave of goodbyes, they turned and walked in opposite directions, both turning around about six feet away and looking back at each other, hating to leave.

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Emma pulled the door to her apartment open and stepped in, the warmth from inside instantly making her limbs tingle.

"Hey baby. You were gone for awhile," Ryan said as Emma walked by him. He placed a kiss on the top of her blonde, wind-swept hair and handed her a steaming mug of coffee.

She took it with an appreciative 'mmmhh' and raised it to her lips, taking a sip and feeling the burning liquid slide down her throat and come to a rest in her stomach. "French Vanilla?" Emma asked, a sarcastically shocked look planted on her face. "Dad you remembered!" she joked.

He hit her lightly on her arm with a playful look on his face. "Hey is it my fault the last time I bought coffee the Hazelnut was in the French Vanilla box?" Ryan countered with a smile.

"Whatever helps you sleep at night," Emma quipped back.

"So why were you gone so long?" Ryan asked lightly, not wanting to make her uncomfortable.

"I ran into a friend at Massimo's," Emma replied, referring to the coffee shop her and Ellie had visited. "Then we went and sat in the park."

Ryan simply nodded his head. He could tell by the way Emma was avoiding his gaze that she didn't want to talk about it. "Hey what do you say about going to Newport for the weekend? Grandma Kirsten wants to see us," Ryan offered.

"This weekend?" Emma asked. "It's Thursday. Kind of short notice isn't it?"

"Ya I know but I think a trip to the west coast will do us some good. The funeral has taken a lot out of you. I can tell. And plus you haven't seen your grandparents and Seth and Summer and Reese and Hannah for over a month. They miss you," Ryan begged.

Emma sighed. "I miss them too … when does our flight leave?" she caved with an exasperated sigh.

Ryan stood from his barstool and kissed his daughters' head. "You rock," he said. "And our flight leaves at six pm tomorrow." He turned and walked away with a bagel in his mouth and a coffee mug in his hand.

Emma waited for her dad to leave the room before pulled out her cell phone and the piece of paper and quickly dialling Ellie's number.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 

The song "California" by Phantom Planet rang out from her cell phone. Ellie picked it up and read the caller ID. The name Emma flashed across the screen.

"Hey," Ellie answered perkily. "What's up?"

"What are you doing tomorrow?" Emma asked immediately.

"Nothing why? Is everything ok?" Ellie's tone showed extreme levels of concern.

"Ya, ya everything's fine. It's just that I'm leaving tomorrow night and I wanted to see you before I left," Emma rushed out.

"You're leaving?" Ellie asked, her tone slightly panicked. "Where are you going?"

"I'm just going for the weekend; to Newport. I have family that lives there and my dad wants us to visit. I'll probably be back by Sunday," Emma said.

Ellie let out a sigh of relief. When Emma told her that she was leaving, Ellie had had the unexplainable urge to tell her she wasn't allowed to leave. Suddenly, loosing Emma was the scariest ting to her and she couldn't explain why. All she knew was that she felt connected to her.

"Don't you have school?" Ellie asked, hoping that somehow her and Emma could get together.

"I'll use the funeral as an excuse. I'll tell the office around ten that the stress from the funeral is getting to me and that I'm going home. Then we can meet up," Emma said.

Ellie smiled. "That'll work?"

"Of course," Emma replied. "Can you meet me outside St. Marksburg Prep at ten am?" Emma asked.

"Ummm … sure. Where is it?" Ellie asked.

"On the corner of East 114th and Madison Ave. Think you can find it?" Emma finished.

"Sure it's just down the street from my grandfather's house," Ellie said.

"Ok so ten am sounds good to you?" Emma asked.

"Ten am sounds great."

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX FRIDAY-3PM 

"Emma we're going to be late!" Ryan yelled up the spiral stairs. It felt like he was constantly telling his daughter they were going to be late for one thing or another. She was just like Marissa in that sense.

Emma came flying down the stairs, her long hair pulled back into a ponytail. "I'm coming, I'm coming! Dad our flight doesn't even board for another three hours. You need to calm down," she said as she walked to the door and dropped her last bag.

"Em, you know how much I hate …"

Emma finished his sentence. "…to fly. You say that every month when we go. You think after sixteen years you would be use to it by now. Tranquilo padre, tranquilo," she said with a grin.

Ryan stared at her. He hated when she spoke in Spanish, something she was fluent in. He could never understand a word she said. And then there was the times she spoke French, another language she was fluent in. Ryan found it incomprehensible that his little girl could speak both Spanish and French.

"Someone pays attention in class," Ryan quipped.

"Hoy en clase, mi amigo Evan de México y sus amigos jugaron a fútbol y ganaron por diez puntos. ¿Hablo español muy bien? ¿Sí?"

"Not funny," Ryan said, picking up their bags and carrying them into the hall.

"Tranquilo padre, tranquilo," Emma repeated.

_**READ!**_

**Ok I know, weird place to end it. But I ran out of time. Sorry for the wait. Oh and …**

**I'm skipping the trip to Newport. The next chapter is gonna be Emma and Ryan when they get back. And the next chapter will be Ellie and Emma discovering that they're twins and Marissa's gonna come into the picture as well. **

**Oh and by the way, the Spanish above just means:** "Today in class, my friend Evan from Mexico and his friends played soccer and won by ten points. I speak Spanish very well? Yes?"

**Enjoy! R&R!**

**Love, Megan**


	5. Chapter 5

She raked her hair back into a ponytail, then tucked her knee-length flirty skirt under her as she sat on her bed. Ellie sat on her vanity chair opposite her, sad smile on her face.

"So it sounds like you had a good time then," Ellie said, then attempted to ignore the longing in her heart for a real family.

"Ya it was great. We hung out and told stories and took lots of pictures," Emma responded.

"Can I see the pictures?" Ellie asked tentatively.

Emma gave her a confused look but nodded and reached into her desk, extracting the envelope from her drawer and patting an empty space on the bed beside her. Ellie took up the space beside Emma and watched as she removed the pictures and adjusted them in her hands.

The first depicted a loving couple, arms looped around each others, standing in a luxurious backyard beside a pool.

"That's my aunt Summer and my uncle Seth," Emma said, pointing to the couple, then flipping the picture. Ellie stalled; there was something startlingly familiar about the young, dark-haired woman's' face, something that made Ellie believe she had seen her before. But Emma had moved on to the next picture and Ellie brushed it aside.

The next picture was of a medium-height, good-looking guy around eighteen with unrulely brown curls and a charming smile standing behind Emma, his arms crossed over her collarbone, elbows resting on her shoulders, head resting against hers.

"My cousin Reese," Emma said, then flipped the picture.

The next was of Reese, Emma and another girl, splashing around in the infinity pool. "And that's Reese's sister Hannah," Emma said, pointing to the girl who was beside Reese with the cute face.

The next picture was of what seemed to be Emma's whole family standing in front of a large fireplace. "Those are my grandparents Sandy and Kirsten, my aunt and uncle, Reese and Hannah, me, and my dad," Emma said as she pointed to each person.

She made a move to go to the next picture but Ellie stopped her, eyes wide and staring.

"What is it?" Emma asked, concerned.

Ellie pointed silently to the background of the picture on the mantle of the fireplace, mouth agape.

"Is that what I think it is?" Emma asked, awe-struck.

"Do you have a magnifying glass?" Ellie asked.

"Sure," Emma said with a coy grin on her face. She hurled herself off the bed with Ellie on her heels and ran into her dad's study, thrusting the picture onto the desk and pulling the magnifying glass out of the top drawer.

"My dad uses this to put intricate details onto his work. He's an architect," Emma said, pulling up two chairs. Ellie sat in the one that Emma was occupying and watched as Emma adjusted the picture and focused the magnifying glass on the fireplace mantle.

In a mahogany frame set just off the centre of the mantle, a picture of Ryan and Marissa curled up on the couch adorned the frame. They were sitting on the Cohen's living room couch, Ryan's arm draped around Marissa's shoulder, Marissa leaning into his embrace. They looked to be around eighteen.

"No way," Ellie breathed. "That's my mom."

"And that's my dad," Emma replied. "Son on a bitch!" She stood suddenly from her chair and ran into the living room.

"Emma!" Ellie yelled, running after her. Emma stopped beside her fireplace, looking at the pictures that adorned the room. "Emma what are you doing?" Ellie asked.

Emma picked up an old picture, one that showed Ryan holding baby Emma who couldn't have been more than a couple weeks old. "There was always something off about this picture," Emma said, flipping the frame over and unfastening the clips. She removed the picture from its frame and looked up to Ellie after noticing a crease where the picture had been folded. Carefully, she unfolded it and gasped as the hidden part of the picture came into view.

Beside Ryan with Emma in his arms was Marissa who was holding an identical baby.

"That's me," Ellie said, pointing to the baby that Marissa was holding.

"Does this mean that we're twins?" Emma asked, finding her breath catching in her chest.

"Emma!" a male voice rang out from the front hall.

"My dad!" Emma hushedly whispered to Ellie.

"Em?" Ryan called again. He walked into the living room and stopped dead in his tracks when he saw Emma and who he assumed to be Ellie standing side-by-side in front of the fireplace, a picture of him and Marissa holding their girls clutched tight in Emma's grasp.


	6. Chapter 6

Ryan stared, dumbfounded, at the two girls who were staring expectantly back at him. He could feel his breath catching in his chest and knew beyond any doubt in the world that it was Ellie standing there beside Emma.

"Emma?" He managed to say before running his hands through his hair like he always did when he was stressed and taking a step towards his girls. "Ellie?" It was a question, not a statement. He took another step towards them and, hesitantly, reached out to Ellie and pulled her into a hug, taking notice of the fact that she was identical to Emma in every way.

Ellie sniffled and tried to comprehend the fact that she was embracing her father, a father she had wanted her whole life. She felt one of Ryan's arms slide off her back and reach outwards, inviting Emma into the embrace who willingly accepted.

Ryan realized that it was the first time he had held both his daughters in his arms at the same time in almost sixteen years. Pulling away, he stared into Ellie's face at a loss for words.

"God do you look like your mother," he said quietly, then placed a kiss to her forehead.

"Dad you have a lot of explaining to do," Emma said from beside Ellie.

"So do you," Ryan countered. "But I think we should do this with your mother."

Ellie and Emma exchanged a look, then looked back to their father. "What do you mean?" Ellie asked.

"I mean that everything that happened with me and you mother deserves a two-sided explanation. I think she would want to be here to tell you guys what really happened on her part," Ryan said sadly. "Now tell me how you met."

"Nah uh," Emma said with a cheeky smile. "This works both ways. If you want to wait for Marissa Cooper to get here and explain things, then you have to wait for an explanation from us too."

Ryan stared his daughters down, then shook his head in disbelief. He still couldn't wrap his head around the fact that both his daughters were standing in front of him. "Fine. Ellie do you have your mothers number?"

"Ya but good luck getting a hold of her. She's always busy. Normally it's Holly, her assistant, who answers the phone and she tells me that she'll pass on the message. But maybe your luck will be better," Ellie stated, reaching into her purse and pulling out a card with two numbers written on it. "Try them both, either will work. And use your name, sometimes it works too."

Ryan nodded and took the card with a smile, excused himself, and left his twins to talk amongst themselves.

"You really think this is going to work Ellie?" Emma questioned.

"Depends. My mom … our mom … always talked about a guy from high school that she loved and never stopped loving. Maybe if it's Ryan, they'll get back together," Ellie dreamed.

"And we'll all live happily ever after," Emma stated sarcastically.

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

Ryan sat down on the leather sofa of his study, phone clutched in his hands, trembling as he lifted if from the receiver and slowly dialled the numbers on the card. Ringing filled his ear as he waited, then a pretty female voice that Ryan knew instantly wasn't Marissa's answered with a perky, "Hello?"

"Umm … Hi. I'm trying to get a hold of Marissa Cooper," Ryan said awkwardly.

"I'm sorry but Miss Cooper is busy at the moment. Can I leave her a message?" Holly asked politely but slightly impatiently.

"Actually this is really important," Ryan persisted. "It's about her daughters Ellie and Emma. Tell her its Ryan Atwood. I'm sure she'll find herself slightly less busy," Ryan said.

Holly considered for a moment telling the man that Marissa was extremely busy and to call back later, but when he mentioned Emma, the daughter Marissa had left behind with her husband when she moved from New York to LA that nobody knew about except her, she changed her mind. "I'll see what I can do Mr Atwood," she said politely.

Pressing the hold button, Holly placed the phone down on the table and walked to Marissa's dressing room, rapped lightly on the door, and waited for a reply.

"Come in," Marissa called from the other side of the oak door.

Holly turned the handle and pushed the door open, stepping in with what she hoped to be a light smile. "There's a phone call for you Marissa," she said.

"I asked you to hold all my calls Holly," Marissa said politely.

"I know Marissa. But the man says it's about your daughters Ellie and Emma. He says his name is Ryan Atwood."

Marissa looked up instantly from her magazine with a shocked look on her face and stared at Holly with disbelief. "What did he say his name was?"

"Ryan Atwood," Holly repeated and couldn't tell whether Marissa was experiencing good shock or bad.

"What line?" Marissa asked instantly.

"Two," Holly said, then backed her way out of the room with a smile.

Marissa picked up the line and hit the two button, then cautiously raised the phone to her ear. "Hello?" she asked tentatively.

Ryan was taken aback at how tired her voice sounded after sixteen years of not hearing a word. "Marissa?" he asked slowly after a pause.

Marissa let out a breath of relief, realizing just then and there how much she had missed his voice. "Ryan," she said somewhat disbelievingly. "Haven't heard from you in awhile."

"I know," Ryan said sadly.

"Is everything ok?" Marissa asked, her voice slightly panicked. "Is Emma ok?"

"Ya, ya Emma's fine. But I think you need to come to New York for a while. We have a little bit of a situation," Ryan said.

"What kind of situation?"

"Emma and Ellie met."

In the simple statement that Ryan said, Marissa felt her whole world crash around her; every lie she had ever told Ellie about her father walking out on them, about how it was just them in this world, had crumbled beneath her perfectly pedicured feet.

"How?" was all she could manage to get out.

"I don't know. They said that I had a lot of explaining to do and I told them that it would be best if you were here to help me. And then they said that until they got information, we weren't getting any," Ryan said.

"I'll be on the next flight out," Marissa said, running around her dressing room and shoving things into a duffle bag she had stored under her futon.

"Really?" Ryan said.

"Ryan I'm not letting you do this alone. This is my mess too. Same address?" Marissa asked.

"No we moved after you left with Ellie; 1562 corner of Madison Avenue and 160th; penthouse apartment," Ryan stated his address.

Marissa nodded as she scribbled down the address onto a piece of paper on her vanity. "Just keep the girls there. I'll be on a flight out tonight. With any luck, I'll be there by mid-afternoon tomorrow."

Ryan paused, then said, "Thanks Marissa; for coming out, for doing this with me."

"They're my kids too Ryan. We're in this mess together. I'll see you soon."

"Ya. Soon."

"And Ryan?" her voice was hesitant and apprehensive. "It's really good to hear from you."

"You too," Ryan said, then hung up with a click of the phone. Running his fingers through his hair again, he stood from the leather chair and walked to the living room where Ellie and Emma were waiting, pouring through one of the albums of photos accumulated over the years.

"Is Mom coming?" Ellie asked, swivelling around to face her father who she could feel standing behind her.

Ryan nodded, somehow unable to find his tongue. "She'll be here about noon tomorrow," he said, then turned and walked into the kitchen.

As he sat on the stool with the newspaper in front of him, eyes fixed unfocused on the blurry words before him, Ryan wondered to himself whether he was ready for this.

**Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx**

The three of them sat on the kitchen stools, watching the clock on the wall slowly tick away the minutes. The time of eleven fifty-one stared back at them.

"What time did Mom say she would be here at?" Ellie asked again for about the third time.

Ryan sighed. "Any minute now."

From its spot beside the stove, the phone rang twice, the ring that said there was someone at the door in the lobby. Ryan stared at it for a second, then picked it up. "Hello?"

There was silence for a second as Marissa lost her nerve.

"Hello?" Ryan asked again.

"Ryan, hi," Marissa said. "I'm downstairs. The doorman said I had to call before I could go up."

Ryan could hear the smile in her voice and smiled himself. "Sure. Come on up." He hung up the phone and turned back to his girls. "You guys ready for this?"

Ellie and Emma exchanged a look of scepticism, then turned back to their father and nodded.

A knock from the front door sounded and the three of them exchanged another look.

"Who wants to get that?" Ryan asked.

Ellie sighed and took a deep breath. "I will," she said as she crossed the threshold towards the front door, swung it open and faced her mother.

Marissa was standing there, as beautiful as ever, dressed in a pair of designer jeans and an elegant shirt, her hair in loose waves, pulled out of her face by large sunglasses that she seemed to have passed her love for onto her daughters.

"Ellie," she breathed out, then dropped her suitcase and embraced her little girl who was only an inch or two shorter. When they pulled apart, Marissa glanced around the apartment, her eyes coming and stopping at Emma who was leaning against her father, Ryan's arm draped over her shoulders.

Marissa walked slowly over to them, a sad smile on her face. "Emma," she said, shaking the tears out of her eyes. She held her arms open for Emma who hesitantly walked into the embrace and held tightly onto the mother she had always wanted.

Ryan smiled as he watched the interaction, then waited as Emma slowly pulled away. This left him and Marissa since Emma had moved to beside her sister.

This time, This place  
Misused, Mistakes

"It's been far too long," Ryan said as he held open his arms and Marissa slowly walked into them.

Too long, Too late  
Who was I to make you wait

He inhaled the scent of her sweet perfume, every memory of their time together flashing through his mind. He wanted this feeling to last forever.

Just one chance  
Just one breath

Slowly and hesitantly, they pulled away and granted each other a small smile before Marissa turned back to her bags.

_Just in case there's just one left  
'Cause you know,  
you know, you know _

She could hear her pulse coursing through her ears, pounding deep within her. She was lost.

"I missed you so much," Marissa said, turning and adressing Emma again. "Both of you," she said, taking each hand of her daughter's in one of her own. "I think your dad and I have some explaining to do."

_I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long_

Ryan nodded and led his three girls over to the living room and guestured for them to sit on the couch. Emma immediately sat beside Ryan and Ellie took a seat beside her mother.

_I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
and you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore  
_

"Where do we start Mariss?" Ryan asked her, using the affectionate name he had adopted for her just after high school.

"At the beginning," Marissa replied sadly.

"Things just weren't going well for us," Ryan said slowly. "Everything was going great until you guys were about three months old. Ellie, you came down with a serious case of pnuemonia and we were under so much stress. Then Emma, you got really sick as well and the doctors couldn't figure out why. They ran every test in the book on you but you were a mystery. The two of you were so tiny, in the hospital for about a month. And nobody could figure out why you were sick Em."

_On my knees, I'll ask  
Last chance for one last dance _

Ryan took a second to look at Marissa who's head was hung in the bitter memory that she had hoped she would never have to relive.

"We were spending so much time at the hospital, neither of us were sleeping. And then add to the mix that my brother had just died. But that's another story. After two months of Ellie being on life-support in an incubator and the doctors having no idea what was wrong with Emma, they finally figured out that Emma, you were sick because Ellie was."

_'Cause with you, I'd withstand  
All of Hell to hold your hand_

****"That doesn't make sense," Emma said. "If I was sick because Ellie was but I didn't have pneumonia, then why was I sick?"

Ryan grinned. "The doctors called it 'twin-syndrome'. Sometimes, in really young sets of twins when one of them gets sick, the other twin mimicks their twins symptoms without even having what the other one has. And that's what happened. They figured out that to cure you Em, all they had to do was cure Ellie."

_I'd give it all  
I'd give for us  
Give anything, but I won't give up_

"But by the time the two of you were better our marrige was gone," Marissa said quietly for the first time. "We had argued so much, been under so much strain and worry over our two babies being in the hospital that we were just so sick of each other. And then I got a job offer in Los Angeles. It seemed so perfect at the time. We debated on whether your dad would keep you here for awhile and I would have you in LA for awhile. But we figured that the back and forth would just be disruptive, especially the older you got. And we staying in New York wasn't an option since I had just signed a contract with Ford models and Ryan moving to LA was out of the question since he had just been made partner of his architecture firm."

_I wanted  
I wanted you to stay _

_'Cause I needed  
I need to hear you say _

"The only other option left was to slpit you guys up and never have you know that the other one existed," Ryan finished for her.

_I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I forgive you  
For being away for far too long_

He looked over to Marissa and noted the tears that were welling in her eyes. The decision to spilt their marrige and their girls up had been the hardest thing either one had ever had to do.

"I waited for you," Ryan said quietly, almost unaware of the fact that his and Marissa's daughters were hanging off every word their parents said.

_So keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it   
Hold on to me and, never let me go _

"I sat outside the elevator with Emma in my lap for four hours, waiting for the doors to ding open and you and Ellie to step out," Ryan whispered.

Marissa gasped back another sob. "I waited for you too. I missed my flight and sat in the waiting room with my eyes glued to the door waiting for you to burst through and say that you didn't want me to go, to say that leaving was a mistake; that we needed to keep our marrige and our daughter's together. And I would have. Just to see you standing at that door would have made me come back. You wouldn't have even had to say anything. You were always able to do that to me."

_Keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
_

****Ellie and Emma watched the interaction between their parents in awe and wondered if this was what love was really all about. __


	7. Chapter 7

"Daddy, no, you're doing it wrong!" a four-year-old Emma told her father on the home video Marissa was watching.

Emma grabbed the water wing form her father and blew into the hole, the rubber armband inflating. She turned to Ryan and grinned triumphantly. "See," she said cheekily," I do it betterer."

Marissa laughed at the young version of the daughter she barely knew and continued watching the tape.

Seth suddenly appeared in the frame of the Cohen's backyard, his arms full of beach towels and three bottles of sunscreen. In an instant, Seth tripped walking up the steps, the contents of his armload spilling onto the cement. "Son of a chocolate bar!" he spewed angrily.

Emma let out an adorable laugh and turned to her uncle. "Silly Uncle Seth," she said, head cocked to one side, freckled nose wrinkled. "Chocolate bars don't have babies!"

"Sassy little thing wasn't she?"

Marissa whipped around and spotted Ryan, leaning casually against one of the tall, white marble pillars. "She use to contradict everything you ever said, always thought she was right," he said, walking over to the couch and where Marissa was sitting and gently placing himself down beside her. "Mouthy, just like her mother," Ryan joked.

Marissa smiled sadly.

"I'm sorry. I meant that as a joke you know," Ryan apologized.

"I know," Marissa said quietly.

Ryan looked at her, confused, then said, "Then what's wrong?"

Marissa turned to Ryan with watery eyes and sniffed.

"Hey, hey, hey," Ryan said, shuffling closer to Marissa and putting his hand on her arm, wanting so bad to wrap her in a hug but thinking it too soon. "What's wrong?"

Marissa let out a heavy sigh, then said, "Ry I've missed out on so much of Emma's life. I don't know her at all. I watch this tape and it's like watching Ellie as a little girl except this is a memory that I don't have."

Ryan smiled sympathetically. "Mariss I fell that exact same way about Ellie. Even though her and Emma look identical to each other, I can't help but feel that I don't know Ellie at all. I don't know her favorite color, her favorite band, when she took her first step …"

"…her first word," Marissa finished, a habit that had yet to die-hard even after over sixteen years. "I think we name the biggest mistake of our lives, getting a divorce and separating out girls," she said.

"Then lets change that; we'll get to know our girls. Not only will we spend as much time as possible with them, but between us we can get to know the other twin," Ryan said.

"You mean like I tell you something about Ellie and you tell me something about Emma?" Marissa queried.

"Exactly," Ryan exclaimed. "Like Emma, her first word was batman, courtesy of Seth," Ryan laughed.

Marissa laughed too. "Ellie's first word was pudding."

Ryan grinned lopsidedly. "Tell me more."

Marissa smiled; she loved talking about her daughter. "When she was three, I lost her in Barney's," she laughed. "I panicked, looking around for her everywhere. I was hysterical and had half the store looking for her. Eventually, I found her in the Electronics department sprawled out on the floor watching Sesame Street. I don't think I've ever held her tighter," she smiled. "Now tell me something about Emma."

Ryan let a genuine smile grace his face. "I had taken her to Newport one time, which I've been doing every couple of months since she was born, I think she was about four, and we were hanging out in Sandy and Kirsten's backyard. Seth was holding Emma while I helped Kirsten put out snacks and I turned around for a second just in time to see Seth trip going down the stairs and drop Emma," Ryan smiled, even though at the time his heart had been pounding so loud in his ears and he could barely breathe. He looked to Marissa who's fingertips were over her slightly parted lips.

"Emma's head was split open and Seth was hysterical. There was blood everywhere and the whole time the only thing I could think about was how she was the only thing that I had left that was connected to you and how much I loved her. We rushed her to the hospital and the doctors gave her twelve stitches just before her hairline on her forehead, which is why she has the scar."

Marissa smiled. "I was wondering how she got that."

"What are we going to do Marissa?" Ryan asked. "Now that the girls have found each other there's no way we can split them up."

"I don't know Ry. Los Angeles is my life now. And you have everything here in New York. But Emma and Ellie will de damned if we keep them apart."

They were silent for a minute before Ryan said, "Well they're not going to have very much choice are they? I guess you're just going to have to take Ellie back to LA with you and Em and I will stay in Manhattan," Ryan said sadly.

"Ryan I don't know if I can bare to leave her behind again. The guilt nearly killed me last time, I don't think I can handle that kind of heartbreak again."

Ryan tentatively reached out and placed his hand on top of hers. "There's no point ripping our hair out tonight. It's one o'clock in the morning, we can talk with the girls tomorrow. By the way what are you doing up this late?"

Marissa smiled, unable to ignore the concern in his voice. "I couldn't sleep. I figured I would just come out here and watch tv when I saw the home movie. I hope you don't mind."

"Why would I mind? Marissa I want you to always remember what I'm about to say to you: you gave me Emma. You gave me the one thing that means more to me in this world than anything else, other than Ellie and you of course. Emma is as much yours as Ellie is mine. Their _ours, _despite what any stupid custody papers say. You got that?"

Marissa smiled sweetly. "I don't know how we ever ended this," she said quietly before leaning in and kissing him on the cheek, then getting off the couch and heading back to the spare room where she opted to stay instead of a hotel.

As Ryan watched her walk away, he placed his fingertips to the tingling spot on his cheek where she had kissed him and wondered the same thing.


	8. Chapter 8

He woke to silence the next morning, unsettling him already his his still-half-asleep state. Immediately he knew something was not right, not normal. Unease washing over him, Ryan swung his legs over the egde of his depressingly lonely bed and crossed the threshold to his door, swinging it open and staring out. Not a single sound met his ears.

Wondering why it was so suspiciously quiet, Ryan walked around the apartment, finding no one, then at last checking Emma's room. It was empty too. He walked back into the kitchen. Emma knew better than to leave the house without leaving a note, so why couldn't he find her or Ellie anywhere. Deciding to try his last resort, Ryan walked to the spare room and gently swung the door inwards, a sliver of light illuminating Marissa's sleeping frame. The last thing he wanted was to disturb her, but the fear of his missing daughters pressing in on him was far more terrifying than waking up his ex-wife.

With a breath of hesitation, he stepped into the room and perched himself on the edge of the bed, wondering how best to wake her up.

"Marissa," he whispered.

She didn't stir.

"Mariss?"

Sighing, Ryan scooched closer to her warm body and placed a hand gently on her shoulder, slowly shaking her body. "Marissa wake up."

Her sleep-filled eyed fluttered open slowly and for a minute, Marissa was reminded of when they had still been married.

"Ryan?" she mumbled sleepily.

"Hey, sorry to wake you up, but do you know where the girls are?"

She immediatly sat up, terrified look on her face. "What? The girls are gone?"

"Calm down, it's okay," Ryan soothed. "It's just that the girls aren't in the apartment and they didn't leave a note."

The look of terror on Marissa's face only intensified. "Well, where did they go?" Her voice was shaking.

"Look, I'm sure they're fine. Emma probably just wanted to take a walk and Ellie went with her or something. I'll go call Emma's cell right now."

"I'm coming with you," Marissa said. She threw the blankets off her body, revealing her small shorts covered in shamrocks and her tight black tanktop.

Ryan forced himself to tear his eyes off of her slim body and focus, hearing her walk behind him into the kitchen. He picked up the phone and quickly dialed the all-too familiar number.

RMRMRMRMRMRMRMRMRMRMRMRMRM

"It's Dad," Emma said, checking her caller ID. "Should I answer it?"

"Of course you should. He's your dad and he's probably worried about you," Ellie replied.

"Why should he be? I left him a not ... ohmigod I didn't leave him a note." Emma immediatly answered her phone. "Dad I'm so, so sorry. I meant to leave you a note before we left but I guess I forgot. Ellie and I are at Massimo's getting coffee for everyone, we'll be back at the apartment in about ten mintues."

Ryan sighed out with his relief. "Okay."

"Love you," Emma said as her appology, then hung up.

"That's it?" Marissa exclaimed as Ryan hung up the phone. "You phone her and the only thing you say is 'okay'?!" Her voice was bordering on hysterics.

"Mariss, it's fine, really. Emma and Ellie are down at Massimo's getting coffee. They'll be back in ten minutes."

Marissa took a deep breath and regained her compuse. "Sorry, it just seems like every time I turn my back on Ellie she's getting into some sort of trouble. She scares me Ryan and I'm terrified that one day I'm going to blink and she's going to be gone." Her eyes had brimmed with tears and she had wrapped her arms around herself to keep from crying.

Ryan felt his heart break. "Marissa," he said as he breathed out. Not caring what the concequences of his actions were, he stepped forward and wrapped her in his arms, holding her shaking body to his chest, feeling the warmth of her cheek pressed against his shoulder and the slight dampness on his shirt from her tears. "It's going to be okay. It will. I promise. The fact that she agreed to go and live with your dad means that she wants to get better. You just have to have faith in her. Plus, now that she has a father and a sister, I think Ellie's going to change drastically."

Marissa wiped her tears with the back of her hand and hesitantly pulled away from Ryan. "I'm sorry."

Ryan brushed a stray tear from her cheek away with his thumb. "You have nothing to be sorry for. But we really do need to figure out what's going to happen with them. I think that maybe we should sit down and talk with them."

Marissa nodded. "Sure. How about once they get back?"

"Ya, that sounds good," Ryan agreed. Taking Marissa's hand in his, Ryan led her to the couch in the living room and they sat down.

"They're going to hate us Ryan. We kept them apart for all these years, we kept them from having a real family. And I entirely blame myself for everything that Ellie's going through. If I had been around more, paid more attention to her, then maybe ..."

But Ryan cut her off. "Stop. None of this is your fault. It's mine. If I had just insisted that you stay and we work things out, then Ellie and Emma would have been raised together, with a mother, and a father. But I think that we're both to blame."

Marissa agreed by nodding her head and opened her mouth to say something when the front door opened.

"Keep it PG in there guys, we're coming through," Ellie said. Ryan and Marissa laughed and smiled at their daughters as they walked into the open living room.

"Girls can you take a seat please?" Ryan asked.

Emma and Ellie looked at each other briefly before Ellie sat down on the couch and Emma walked towards her parents, handing them both their coffee and taking a seat beside her sister.

"Girls," Marissa began, voice trembling, and took Ryan's hand for support. He squeezed it gently. The motion did not go unnoticed by the twins. "There's a lot that we need to discuss with you guys and a lot that you need to decide."

"The custody papers say that Emma, you belong to me, and Ellie, you belong to your mother. But we need to know what you girls want to do," Ryan said.

"Wait, so you guys aren't getting back together?" Ellie asked, face falling.

Marissa gently tugged her hand away from Ryan. "Baby this is the first time your Dad and I have seen each other in almost sixteen years. Things don't just pick up from where they left off just like that."

"So what does this mean for me and Ellie?" Emma asked.

Ryan and Marissa gazed into each other's eyes, searching for the answer.

"I think," Ryan began, "That Ellie, you go back to LA with your mom and Emma, you stay here with me."

Ellie and Emma locked gazes with sad eyes. "But we don't want to be split up! We're just getting to know each other!" Ellie protested.

"Baby I know this is hard," Marissa said. "You and I belong in Los Angeles. It's for the best."

"For the best to take me away from the only family I've ever had?!" Ellie shouted. "Mom you've never cared about anything I do! You shipped me off to live with Grandpa here in New York, and just after I get here, you want to bring me back home again the second I found people who actually care about me!"

Ryan looked at Marissa who's eyes were welling with tears. "Ellie, this is not your mother's fault," Ryan defended. "We made the decision to split you up together. We're equally to blame."

"Dad Ellie and I don't want to be seperated again!" Emma protested. "You can't just ship them off and expect me to pretend that they don't exist!"

"Em.." Ryan began.

"No," Emma said, stood up and started to walk away. Ellie pulled herself off the couch and followed her sister. "I hope you're happy."

Ryan and Marissa heard the front door slam closed and Marissa immediatly broke down into tears.

"Baby it's okay," Ryan whispered into her hair as he pulled her into his arms against. "It's going to be okay. We'll get through this together."

"Ryan what are we going to do? Our daughters hate us."

Ryan sighed and nuzzled his head into the crook of her neck. For what felt like the millionth time in their relationship, he had no idea what to say.


End file.
